Stick with me here, people. You know I usually like to start off the Bayou Bengal Briefing with something pertaining to LSU football. But I’ve got something broader I need to talk about today.
Bowl season is too long. There, I said it. We still have nine days until LSU and Louisville go at it in the Citrus Bowl, and I feel like we’ve said everything there is to say.
And we’re just media and fans. Imagine the players and coaches. Sure, at the surface level getting a month to prepare for an opponent sounds like an awesome opportunity. You can be so thorough in your film study and your preparation. It’s great.
But think about it this way. Louisville’s offense ran 899 plays this season. Not all of them were significant. But assuming all plays are equal, and assuming a defender watches just 50 plays per day, the average LSU defender would’ve run out of plays to study by now.
And I know some of these players. There are a lot of guys who started watching film 18 days ago when the bowl was announced. And there’s no way those guys limit themselves to 50 plays a night.
At this rate, there’s such a thing as paralysis of knowledge. Being overprepared might lead to thinking too much and not relying on your instincts. And when you’re playing a guy like Louisville quarterback and Heisman Trophy winner Lamar Jackson, thinking too much could be the death of you.
But mostly, the main issue isn’t with the players. It’s with us. With all due respect to the Tulsa vs. Central Michigans and the New Mexico vs Texas San Antonios of the world, a whole month is just too long to wait in between good, significant football games.
We’re not good at pacing ourselves. We always want more football. Need proof? We complained about the BCS for almost 20 years. We got a national championship game, and the second we got it, we complained there weren’t enough teams. We’re three years into the College Football Playoff era. So, what are we complaining about now? Expand the field to eight. Give us more. More. MORE!
I’m not calling anyone out. Heck, I’m a part of the problem. I’ve written almost three articles per day since the bowl announcement. And there hasn’t been a game in between. I want to see football. I want to watch football and I want to write about football. And I know you want to read about football.
So, stop making us wait so long. Either start the regular season later, extend the regular season or start the good bowl games earlier. Because I can’t wait this long anymore. This stinks.
The Vick-Jackson comparison
On Wednesday afternoon, LSU safety Jamal Adams described Jackson as “Michael Vick 2.0.”
That’s high praise coming from anyone. But for people Adams’ age — and my age — comparing anyone to Vick is like comparing a running back to Bo Jackson or a boxer to Mike Tyson. Vick wasn’t a football player to our generation. He was a video game cheat code.
Madden ’04 was Vick’s Tecmo Bowl. 95 overall. 95 speed. 94 acceleration. 95 agility. 97 throw power. 95 stamina. He was faster than every defender, so you couldn’t drop back in coverage, and he could throw it farther than any quarterback, so you couldn’t pack the box.
I grew up in a suburb of Atlanta, and me and my friends wouldn’t let each other play as the Falcons on Madden ’04. That’s how good Vick was. That’s how respected he was. And that’s who Adams is comparing Jackson to.
But is the on-the-field comparison valid? Let’s look at the numbers:
|Player||Pass Yards||Pass TDs||Comp. %||Rush Yards||YPC||Rush TDs|
|Lamar Jackson ’16||3,390||30||57.6||1,538||6.6||21|
|Michael Vick ’99||2,065||13||57.7||682||5.2||9|
Yeah, it was a different era. But Jackson and Vick don’t even belong in the same conversation statistically. And this is a guy who went on to be the first pick in the NFL Draft — ahead of future Hall of Fame players LaDainian Tomlinson, Reggie Wayne and Drew Brees — we’re talking about.
If Vick played in the spread option era, I think he’s just as unstoppable as Jackson was this year. But he didn’t. So, right now, we’re comparing a video game glitch to the Heisman Trophy winner. And that isn’t exactly fair.
Arbitrary Analysis, part 4
It’s beginning to feel a lot like Christmas. So, I’ve spent this week of the Bayou Bengal Briefing counting down my picks for my top 5 favorite sitcom Christmas episodes.
In the first three Briefings of the week, I revealed my picks for Nos. 3-5. Today, we take a look at my runner-up. And it’s a good one that I doubt a lot of people have seen. So, I’m psyched to get to talk about it.
No. 2: Merry Christmas, Mrs. Moskowitz — Frasier
I understand that “Frasier” isn’t a show for everyone, and this episode is no exception. But if you think you might enjoy the show, this episode is a great place to start. And if you already enjoy the show, chances are, you love this episode.
The episode begins with Frasier meeting a woman in a department store. The woman proceeds to set Frasier up with her daughter, thinking that Frasier is Jewish. Frasier is not Jewish. The woman’s daughter, Faye, and Frasier hit it off and begin dating, but when the mother returns to the fold, Frasier and his family must pretend they are Jewish — on Christmas Eve — to pull off their rouse.
It’s packed with all the fast-talking innuendo and situational irony that Frasier is famous for, including the fantastic wordplay packed into the short clip above. I watch this episode in full every Christmas Eve, so I’m saving it for a couple of days. But I advise you to give it a try if you haven’t before.
And I also advise that you check back to the Briefing on Friday, when I celebrate my pick for the best Christmas sitcom episode in TV history.
Bowl season might be too long, but it gives us so much to write about. Here’s a smattering of some of the articles you might’ve missed Wednesday, from around the Web and right here on SEC Country.
- Who will be the next recruit to commit to LSU football? Sam Speigelman has answers in his mailbag.
- Details of the shooting that included a couple of Louisville football players were released Wednesday.
- Danny Etling and D.J. Chark are stoked to work with Matt Canada.
- LSU offensive lineman Donavaughn Campbell to undergo shoulder surgery.
- Davon Godchaux hasn’t made up his mind about the NFL Draft quite yet.
What people said about LSU football: Fournette edition
Ever since he announced he won’t be playing with his LSU football teammates in the Citrus Bowl, Leonard Fournette has been the talk of the college football world. And that’s only intensified since Stanford running back Christian McCaffrey made the same decision.
So, here’s a special version of ICYMI, just pertaining to what football players from around the country have said about Fournette’s decision.
- Down I-10, some New Orleans Saints players said they would agree, depending on the situation.
- The news makes Miami coach Mark Richt sad.
- One New York Jets linebacker thinks Fournette is making the right decision.
- Another New York Jets linebacker thinks Fournette is being dumb.
- Nick Saban blamed the real culprit for this trend: The College Football Playoff.
- Patron saint of the cautionary tale Marcus Lattimore wouldn’t have made the same decision.
- But former LSU back Jacob Hester supports Leonard.
There are a lot of takes. None of them are right. None of them are wrong. Some of them are really smart. I particularly agree with Jordan Jenkins and Saban.
But the biggest thing to understand is that this trend isn’t going anywhere. Like it or not, preserving a safe future for you and your family is more important than a meaningless bowl game. It’s just the way it is.
Today in made-up holidays
According to NationalDayCalendar.com, today is “National Re-Gifting Day,” a day where we lean into our penchants for laziness and give people we barely care about gifts that we received from other people who we barely care about.
So on this day, the day where we celebrate receiving trash that our tangential relatives and co-workers don’t want, let’s talk about LSU and Ole Miss. Particularly, how LSU just hired a re-gifted Ed Orgeron and how Ole Miss just hired a re-gifted Bradley Dale Peveto.
That’s right, less than a month after former Ole Miss coach and current LSU coach Orgeron fired Peveto, the former LSU special teams coach washed up as Ole Miss’ new linebackers coach.
This is one of the most brilliant jobs of re-gifting I’ve ever seen. LSU got a coach that Ole Miss gave up on nine years ago, and Ole Miss gets a coach that LSU gave up on a month ago. That might not be the spirit of Christmas, but it’s definitely the spirit of an office Christmas party that you only went to because you heard Karen from sales dances on tables after she’s had two glasses of wine.
So, congratulations on accidentally celebrating National Re-Gifting Day, Tigers and Rebels fans. I, for one, think LSU won the re-gift.